Fellow Blog Authors [I refuse to say "bloggers."]

A while ago, Mackenzie suggested that I assign television networks to all our friends. Here you are:

Mackenzie: American Movie Classics, because she understands those classic times. You know, the days when friendships were respected and nurtured? When love was genuine? When you could smoke a cigarette wherever you wanted? Also, because she looks so good in black and white.

Brendon: Home Box Office, because he doesn't like things that are CRAPPY!

Shanks: Entertainment and Sports Programming Network, because he participates in a diverse array of physical and mental challenges [whiffle ball, beer toss, cut-throat anagrams, dick n' slide, badminton, fantasy baseball, etc] and broadcasts his vim/vigor to a large viewing audience.

Doug: FX, because I just looked up and saw that "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" is on in a half-hour, and I bet he's planning on watching it.

Cary: The TV Guide Channel, because it's only tolerable when you're completely blazed. Oooohh... Just kidding, it's because it's full of critical information!

Jamie: Bravo, because there really is a "West Wing" marathon going on constantly. In his mind.

Barn: Public Broadcasting Station, because he's so damned classy! And even when he's not classy, you still say he is. You know, like when you find yourself watching "This Old House" because, well, it's PBS isn't it?

Now goodnight you princes of Maine, you kings of New England. And tell that little sick kid from Malcom in the Middle, Fluffy or whatever, to stop wheezing. It depresses me.