Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Things to Never Say

re: babies

1. "Let's make a baby."
2. "I want my baby inside of you."

Should the baby thing happen, never say the following:

1. "Feeling my baby inside of you is amazing."
2. "There is a miracle in your belly."
3. "You are so beautiful right now."
4. "I'm so jealous of our baby because it's in your beautiful miracle chamber right now."

5 comments:

spiffae said...

shit, I've already said two thirds of those things.

jvs said...

I usually say things like "I want to put my evil inside you," or "I love your cooking, by which I mean to say I will be eating the 'bun' that is curently in your oven. Nothing beats a nine-month marinade!"

This allows me to neatly avoid the issue of making babies altogether.

Lena Webb said...

You just said it! "Making babies"!! NEVER are you supposed to say that!

Pearl said...

Lena, I want to fill you with babies...

jvs said...

I request that this become a recurring feature here at lena.webb.org. Also that you let me impregnate you wth my special, biological, interfacial adapter.

I want to be your sledgehammer?