Monday, April 03, 2006

Seeking single male theoretical astrophysicist to confuse the fuck out of me...

...and also marry me. And then spurn my affections because there just isn't enough room in his crazy-ass brain for love. But he would name an equation or two after me-- maybe a new particle or form of matter. That would be so hot. Call me.

So I'm still hot for theoretical astrophysicists-- big deal. I thought it might be just a phase, kind of like when all my friends had New Kids on the Block sleeping bags, but upon reading the following sentence it all came back to me:

"Nichol was part of a team that detected dark energy's 'shadow' on the ancient cosmic microwave background radiation, a relic of the cooled radiation from the Big Bang."


Hot! I'm serious-- it's time to go slut around the local planetarium. But even if I do things like that, I bet I won't bag me a theoretical astrophysicist because they're all holed up, too busy being brilliant and stuff.
...and drinking RED WINE.

Me: Do you want another glass of the Chateauneuf-du-Pape?
Him: [2 minute silence, then distractedly] No... No thanks, I'm almost there.. I just have to plot the...
Me: Plot the what? What are you working on?
Him: [thrusts a supplementary figure in my direction]

Me: Ohhh... Neatsville... [takes his glass and retreats to the sunporch with the wine bottle]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

So it's really a shame that I'm not a boy, Lena. Cause I can totally tell you about quantum cosmology. You see how it works is that quantum theory is applied to the whole universe. And that's strange because USUALLY large systems (like the universe) obey classical laws-not quantum ones. Okay, now while I can't explain everything here, I'll also tell you that redshift is an increase with wavelength of radiation emitted by an object in the solar system as a result of the Doppler effect. I guess the easiest way to put it is that light seen from other galaxies shows up differently than it does from here. Tifft showed that redshift was quantized. And as for Shrodinger, well he can fucking go to hell because he's making my life miserable.

Now, find me a guy who can explain Huckel theory and you'll find me an orgasm.

Werd. What up now Amos Epstein?